


When You Sleep

by halfaxa



Category: The Mighty Boosh (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-08-11 01:04:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7869283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfaxa/pseuds/halfaxa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something's wrong with Vince, but Howard blames himself for the breakdown in their relationship. After two months of not speaking Vince calls Howard sounding dangerously upset and vulnerable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ❤

_loosely based off the song when you sleep by my bloody valentine X you should listen to it its a cute song_

It was happening again. Vince was falling, tumbling and hurting. Not just himself, but Howard too, and Howard couldn't do anything to stop it. Well, he probably could somehow, tie him to the bed to make sure he stays home but Howard didn't want to hurt him even more.

The two sat on the sofa like they always did, watching telly, eating toast but recently their conversations had been growing thin. It didn't make sense, Howard was the same person he'd always been, what was going wrong? Vince hadn't changed, not really, but now when he lay next to the smaller man in bed he couldn't help but feel a distance, it was like he loved Vince more than Vince loved him but Howard was convinced that that wasn't true, why would he? He hadn't done anything wrong, all he knew was something over the last few months had changed. 

It was at night that Howard cast his mind back to where this had started, he was getting no answers from Vince after all, anytime he tried to bring it up Vince would just tell him that he loved him very much and then leave for the day and not come back till the early hours of the morning often, acting like it was normal. Maybe it was normal for a socialite like Vince, but not to him. Howard turned to his side as he laid in bed next to his partner(?) and gazed upon his pointy features, almost a complete juxtaposition of his own. His huge eyes were still lined with blackness but the blackness had now smudged down past his cheekbones and blending in with his dark mass of hair. 

 

_When I look at you  
Oh, I don't know what's real_

 

Then the day eventually came, Howard was working in the shop when Vince came in looking slightly flustered which was unusual, especially since it was noon, Howard would rarely see Vince between the time of 10 AM and 10 PM.

"Howard, can we chat," Vince said, softer and more serious than usual.

"Sure, do you wanna go some place else?" Howard suggested but Vince stopped him.

"No, this wont take long, i just need to say something," Vince paused.

"What is it?" 

"Its just...i don't think," He sighed, "I don't think it's gonna work...us, I mean...I'm sorry Howard,"

"What do you mean?" Howard said after a moment of processing whatever had just been said, "So, you don't love me anymore?"

"No I do," Vince said sternly, "That's the problem," And quickly the lean figure turned round and left the shop, and left Howard just as easily as that. Howard felt sick, he didn't know what had just happened, not that Vince hadn't made it explicitly clear, he just didn't understand. He had worried for so long that there was something wrong with Vince but after all the problem was, well, him.

 

 _And I'll see you tomorrow_  
And it won't be long  
Once in a While  
Then you take me down  
Then you walk away.

 

\---

 

It was a grey day, the sky was grey, the mood was grey, Vince even swore he had a few strands of hair that were grey. What was happening to him? Everything was changing, and the things he used to enjoy he couldn't anymore, the people he used to like bored him and life in general seemed suddenly unfulfilling. The more he thought about it, the more he disliked about himself, from his face to his personality, he was confused as to why, claustrophobia ached in his fragile body that felt like it was falling apart. he was falling apart and he didn't want Howard to see it. That's why he had ended it. Vince was changing and it was hurting Howard, and the more it hurt Howard the more Vince despised himself.

He tried to continue life like he normally would, see friends, go out places, have fun but something wasn't the same, something was seriously wrong and Vince punished himself in different forms whether it was skipping meals or pushing those that he loved away.

It was that night that he found himself stood in the rain at the end of the street huddled round a pay phone calling the first person he thought of. Of course, it was Howard, there was nobody in the world he thought more about than Howard occupied his mind like blood occupied his veins. The phone rang for an agonizingly long time, each passing second of the ringing phone felt like several minutes but eventually the phone line cracked and a voice filled Vince's ears.

"Hello, who is this?" Howard spoke and Vince tried to find his voice from somewhere, "If this is a prank i swear-"

"It's me." Vince cut him off.

"Who?" Howard asked, ouch, it hurt that he didn't recognize Vince's voice like he'd hoped, it had only been two months since they spoke, but the traffic was loud and the rain was thundering down.

"Vince?" Howard sounded shocked.

"Yeah," Unsure what to say Vince hoped Howard would sense some sort of desperation in the few words he had muttered.

"What's wrong?" Howard sounded concerned, why on earth was Vince calling him at nine o'clock in the evening and why now? He had ended things, and didn't seem too upset about it either.

"I, um, don't really know," There was a pause on both sides of the line, "Can you come pick me up?" 

"Of course, where are you?" the sincerity in Howard's voice was the most comforting thing Vince had felt in the last few weeks, he gave him the street address and waited in the rain. He was in a proper state, not only was he drenched now but he knew he looked rough, his stubble in need of shaving and his hair a raggedy mess.

Howard put the phone down quickly, grabbing his car keys faster than he ever needed to before and setting off to find Vince. He was imensely worried, he had never heard Vince like this before, Vince was never vulnerable, he would laugh anything off, enjoy any occasion. As he pulled onto the street he saw the small figure stood at the end of it, looking smaller than he had ever seen him before. He looked ill, this wasn't the Vince that Howard remembered, however it was the Vince that Howard loved.

Before the car had even stopped Vince had hold of the car door and had slid in the vehicle. Neither of them new quite what to say, but Howard knew what he needed to do, and Vince knew that if he weeped in the car now Howard would assume the worst but he couldn't help it. He turned away, looking out of the window and hoping that the rain disguised any tears escaping his eyes.

When they reached the flat Howard opened Vince's door and held the man's hand as he heaved himself up and let Howard lead him into his old home. The familiarity of it was yet another comfort, living with Leroy like he had been for the last few weeks didn't compare to living with Howard at all. Howard carefully sat him down on the sofa and began making a hot drink, bringing it over to Vince when it was made along with a blanket that he draped over his sharp shoulders. Howard sat down next to him, thinking of where to start.

"What made you call?" He asked softly.

"I don't know," Vince whispered, "Well i do know, i miss you Howard, and everything's wrong,"

"What do you mean everything's wrong?"

"In my head Howard, nothing's right...all my emotions...the don't make sense," Vince whimpered and Howard clutched the body close to his, letting Vince's head fall into the crook of his neck, embracing his damp friend as best as he could. Howard knew he was no good at times like this, he just hoped that this was enough for Vince.

"How don't they make sense?" Howard pushed a little further, confused at what Vince was trying to say.

"Everything's wrong, i've wanted to speak to you in so long but i've been scared, because i've changed, and i don't want to hurt you again," 

"Again? When did you ever hurt me?"

" I just did, i saw it in you when we were together, i was being distant, and it was hurting you, but i couldn't help it," Vince's speech as rushed and spoken through tears but Howard could just about make out what Vince was trying to say.

"Do you mean that you're unwell?" Howard paused, "In your head?" 

"I don't know, Howard. I think maybe yes, things don't make sense to me anymore," Vince projected a little louder.

"It's okay, we'll sort it out but for now you need sleep," Howard noted, after noticing the dark circles pasted across his under eye. Vince nodded and Howard helped him up and lead him to the bed, their bed, and both of them climbed into the bed. Vince burrowed into Howard's chest and and Howard's arms arms grasped the slightly quivering body until they both fell asleep. We'll sort this out in the morning, Howard thought, before whispering love into Vince's hair and falling asleep himself. 

 

_When i look at you  
Oh, I don't know what's real_


	2. Vince comes home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vince returns after being away for six months, he's not sure everythings going to be the same again.

Today was the day things were finally going to be normal again. It had been a long time coming, six whole months in fact, but the honey coloured sun was peeking through the branches of trees and shining into Vince's room and the air of the day seemed as pleasant as it could be. Vince lied there in the gentle sunlight for a number of minutes, letting the rays of light highlight the contours of his face and the blue of his eyes until eventually, he arose. A lot had changed in the last few weeks, although at first he struggled he was back on track now and ready to be discharged. Stood in front of his full length mirror (which was one of the very few objects in his room) Vince looked at his new body, not much had changed physically, although the angles of his body seemed to appear less rakish now, he was still Vince. There was just one thing that bothered him now, something that didn't exist six months ago. That was two large bandages that covered both his wrists. 

Trying not to linger on this detail, he changed into his pre-selected leaving outfit which consisted simply of black skinny jeans and a The Cure t shirt with Robert Smith on the front. Now having a few hours to kill before getting picked up, Vince took the time to read a proper book, not the NME or Dazed and Confused, that was something that Vince had not so willingly been encouraged to do here, but grew to enjoy, sort of. But the time wasn't going fast enough, and after three long confusing hours the clock read 11:45, he was leaving in less than half an hour. Suddenly the thought scared him in a way that he never had before, tonight he would be lying in his own proper bed, in his own home, surrounded by everything that reminded himself of what he had come from. 

There was a knock and Vince shot up, the nurse pushed her head round the door and told him it was time. Gathering his stuff last minute like usual, and shoving it into his suitcase Vince noticed how little he owned here, being the unashamedly materialistic person he was, he would not miss this. In fact looking around the small box room he realised there was a lot he would not miss and that leaving was not as much of a problem as he anticipated a few hours ago. 

The further he walked down the main hall, passing the lounge, passing the telly room, passing the kitchen he realised he was excited, something he hadn't been in forever, there was one thing in particular he was excited about, seeing Howard. The last time he had visited they had argued and was ordered by Vince not to come back. It was that night that the incident happened, just thinking about it made his healing wrists sting again, at least metaphorically he thought. The nurse lead him to the reception where he hadn't been allowed to enter for what seemed like forever and then there he was. He was sat cross legged on one of the allocated seats biting at a hang-nail, in the moment before he noticed Vince's presence, Vince bathed in the sight, it had been so long, he had so much to tell, so much to apologise for, so much to make up. But Vince wished no other person to make this time up with. 

Then Howard noticed the familiar presence, something he only just realised he had missed so deeply. There he was, his fashionable, infuriating and beloved companion, Vince smiled almost awkwardly, but Howard froze in the moment, examining the changes he saw in his friend, he looked better, much better, his black feathery hair and ridiculous red cowboy boots were the same, all the little changes didn't matter, there was just one thing. What had happened? Where did these bandages come from? Why didn't he find out about this? His best friend has clearly tried to kill himself and he hadn't even known? Howard was furious, not at Vince, but at himself. Where was he when his happened? He should have been there with Vince, this was wrong, very wrong.

The same nurse lead both of them towards the desk where Vince was being signed out for the final time. Within minutes it was over and Vince tasted freedom at last. "I cant believe this is actually happening," Vince exhaled, extending his bare arms and enjoying the feeling of the air that didn't belong to a hospital environment.

"Must have felt like forever," Howard replied, somewhat awkwardly. He had not anticipated this at all. 

"Yeah it did, free at last, did u miss me then?" Vince smirked, moving in closer to Howard as the pair strolled towards his car. 

"Wasn't much different to be honest," Howard joked, loosening up a bit, even if they did have something to talk about, Vince was still Vince, and he had his best friend back. 

"Really? I though at least somebody would have died without me," 

"Nope, no suicide attempts as of yet," He laughed, and then realised what words had actually come out of his mouth, please let Vince not have heard that. But he had and he looked instantly hurt.

"Aha, well thats a shame, " he murmered shortly.

"Do you wanna go somewhere?" Howard quickly changed the subject.

"I kind of wanna go home," Vince sighed. 

"Right," Howard said awkwardly, "Home," It wasn't that home had changed since Vince had left, it was hearing Vince saying 'home' and realising what he hadn't had without him, it hadn't been home without Vince.

 

***

 

Vince layed in his bed, i his real bed that felt no different to his hospital bed. Was this really what real life was like? It had only been a matter of hours since he'd got here but the sense of adventure he associated with the place seemed to have disappeared. Even Howard seemed different, so reserved, he was anyway but more than normal, like he was talking to a stranger almost. What Vince had wanted was for Howard to scoop him up in his large grasp and hold him till all the shit went away, but here he was, alone again. Vince didn't know what time it was but he figured it was only around midnight, he had sulked off to bed earlier than normal today just because he couldnt handle the pressure he felt was on him to be his usual self. What even was his usual self? And what would Howard think if i quietly appeared in his bed in a matter of minutes. 

Pulling back the covers and feeling the cold air blanket over his half naked body, Vince slinked out of his room and just across the landing into Howard's room, there was just enough room in his bed for him to slide in without, potentially waking Howard up. Instantly, Vince was cascaded with the warmth or his friend, this felt more like home. Wriggling a little too much getting comfortable Howard felt the presence of another being.

"Vince?" He croaked out, twisting his body until he was eventually facing the smaller man. 

"Yeah, it's me," Vince shuffled even closer to Howard, burrowing his head instantly into Howard's chest.

"Are you okay, is something wrong?" he replied, concerned, but Vince just took Howard's arms and manually placed them around himself. He was cold, and his frame still seemed as small as ever but Howard got the message. Kissing the mass of black hair, he felt Vince's gentle breaths on his chest and the slight quiver of his body. "It's okay," he cooed, holding Vince like he hadn't for so long, feeling every inch of bare skin, apart from that bandaged, against his own. He liked the juxtaposition between the two, Vince's skinny pointy figure which was almost hairless against his width, Howard was certain he didn't deserve this but Vince disagreed. This was how it was supposed to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short and not that interesting ahahah x sorrry for the long wait and overall unoriginal storyline x hope you still like it X

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading x there may be another (more upbeat) chapter to come (if you want it aha) x


End file.
